Essence of Humanity : The Foundational Needs of Time, Affection, and Respect
In 2007, my father, with quiet wisdom, shared a simple yet profound truth (which I realized much later) : life’s essence revolves around time, affection, and respect. He explained me : how being mindful of these three would guide me through every challenge, help me cultivate a life of dignity and least remorse. Let me explain :
At the most fundamental layer of human existence, we stand suspended between cosmic vastness and fleeting mortality, bound by primal needs that define our essence. Among these, three resonate deeply: Time (समय), Affection (स्नेह), and Respect (सम्मान). These three values form the foundation of human life, transcending socio-political boundaries, cultures, and epochs. However, upon closer scrutiny, we might posit that there are subtle, additional dimensions to human needs that complement and enhance these core values. But at the center of our existence, these three—time, affection, and respect—constitute the essence of what it means to be human.
Time (समय) : The Vessel of Existence
Time is the most abstract and, paradoxically, the most concrete of the human needs. It is the canvas upon which all actions, relationships, and experiences unfold. Human life is a finite event, punctuated by birth and death, and the awareness of this finitude creates urgency and meaning. Without time, there can be no love, no knowledge, no experience.
Time is not merely chronological, not just the ticking of clocks or the rotation of the earth; it is the qualitative experience of moments—the times spent in reflection, in love, in creation. It is within these moments that humans carve out meaning. In fact, the philosopher Martin Heidegger spoke of time as intrinsic to human existence. He suggested that humans do not simply exist “in” time but are fundamentally temporal beings — “being-towards-death” — constantly aware of the limited nature of their existence. This awareness shapes not just how we live, but what we value. Time as a need, then, is not the desire for more hours but a yearning for meaningful moments — moments of presence.
Time manifests itself as a demand for freedom. To live authentically, one must have the freedom to control their time, to decide where and how it is spent. This is the root of the modern existential malaise: the industrialized world, with its rigid schedules and commodification of time, steals from individuals the very moments that constitute life. In the end, it is not time we mourn, but the lost potential of what it could have brought us.
Affection (स्नेह) : The Bridge of Connectivity
If time is the canvas, affection is the brushstroke of life. The need for affection, or love, transcends mere biological imperatives of survival and reproduction. Human beings, as inherently social creatures, crave emotional bonds that grant their existence meaning. In the absence of affection, life becomes desolate and uninhabitable. Affection is not merely romantic love, but the care, empathy, and belonging that we find in relationships, whether familial, platonic, or communal.
Erich Fromm, in his work “The Art of Loving,” argued that love is not just a relationship with others, but a stance toward existence itself. To love is to be connected to the world, to embrace the flow of life in all its richness and complexity. Without affection, we wither psychologically, and without connection, we find ourselves adrift in an existential abyss. The longing for affection is a yearning for recognition, acceptance, and reciprocity — the knowledge that we matter to someone, that we are not alone.
What makes affection fundamental is its reciprocal nature. Unlike mere biological needs (such as hunger), affection requires mutuality; it is not something that can be gained unilaterally. It grows from the intersubjective space between self and other, where both are transformed by the encounter. To live without affection is to live in an existential desert, where loneliness and alienation reign.
Respect (सम्मान) : The Anchor of Dignity
Respect — सम्मान —is perhaps the most misunderstood of the human needs, often confused with admiration or recognition. But at its core, respect is about the acknowledgment of one’s dignity and intrinsic worth. Every human being, by virtue of their existence, deserves respect. It is through respect that humans affirm their individual agency, sovereignty, and autonomy in the world.
Immanuel Kant argued that humans should be treated as ends in themselves and never merely as means. This imperative stems from the recognition of the inherent dignity that each person carries. To live without respect is to be stripped of one’s humanity, reduced to an object, a tool, or a commodity. Respect, then, is not something that one earns but something that is owed to all as a fundamental acknowledgment of their personhood.
In relationships — whether between friends, family, or society — respect allows for genuine equality. It affirms the right to self-determination, to be heard, and to exist without oppression or domination. Respect does not demand agreement or admiration; it demands recognition — the simple but profound acknowledgment that every person has value, regardless of status, achievement, or conformity to societal norms.
Expanding the Circle : Is There More?
While time, affection, and respect form the bedrock of human existence, we might posit additional needs that emerge from or intersect with these three. These include:
- Purpose : Humans are narrative-driven beings. Beyond time, affection, and respect, there is an innate desire for meaning and purpose. Purpose gives structure to time, direction to affection, and context to respect. Viktor Frankl, in his work “Man’s Search for Meaning,” suggests that human beings can endure almost anything, provided they find a reason to keep going. Purpose allows us to transcend suffering, turning our finite time into a legacy of significance.
- Freedom : While implicit in time, freedom is a distinct need. The ability to choose how one spends their time and directs their affection, to act autonomously without coercion, is vital to flourishing. Without freedom, time becomes a prison, affection becomes duty, and respect becomes submission.
- Authenticity : In modern life, humans face pressures to conform, to be inauthentic, or to act in ways that betray their true selves. The need for authenticity can be seen as a manifestation of the desire for respect for one’s individuality, but it also touches on the deeper existential need to live in accordance with one’s values, beliefs, and nature. To live authentically is to live fully, without masks or pretenses.
The Trinity of Human Essence
In the end, Time (समय), Affection (स्नेह), and Respect (सम्मान) form the essence of human needs, the trinity upon which all else is built. Without time, we lose our potential; without affection, we lose our connection; without respect, we lose our dignity. But to be human is to constantly seek a balance between these needs, to navigate the tensions between individual desires and collective existence. And if there is more — purpose, freedom, authenticity — it is because these too arise from the delicate interplay of time, affection, and respect.
In acknowledging these fundamental needs, we touch upon the very nature of humanity: finite, relational, dignified. These are not just desires or luxuries; they are non-negotiables for a life worth living. And perhaps, in their simplicity, they remind us that the pursuit of a meaningful life is not as complicated as we make it out to be — it is about being present, loving deeply, and honoring each other’s humanity.
Thanks for dropping by !
Disclaimer : Everything written above, I owe to the great minds I’ve encountered and the voices I’ve heard along the way.